roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

Why weren't u sad when your sister died? You lived in a hut and were supplied with food for a week

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

salad days!

You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

Two doctors were performing open heart surgery on a 54-year old woman. The surgery was a success, and she is now living comfortably in Portland, OR. She enjoys sweet tea.

why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

A very nervous looking black man walks into a bar full of white people, however, the white people are accepting of all races, so they invite him to sit next to them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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