A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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kk

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said who's there? My name is Knock Knock Oh hi Knock Knock, come in

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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What do you do when you see four black people and a Jew? You buy them

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Who's Micheal Jackson?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops