Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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why was the little girl crying? she just watched her whole family get murdered.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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Denard Robinson

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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