Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

Micheal Curran...that is all.

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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