A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

miha kako si?

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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