What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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kkkk

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What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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