I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

Why did Jimmy go to a Barbershop for the first time? He needed a haircut, and the salon next to his house was closed because of financial problems

why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

A: I accidentally shot my sister with a rifle! B: you don't have a sister? A: exactly

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

What do you call two black men flying an airplane? Pilots.

what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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