Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a rapist

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor

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What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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