What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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Wish me luck these are the ten numbers on my keno 19 65 80 2 34 72 68 22 12 8

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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What is my name? I dont know

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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hi jonny

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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