What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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woman's rights

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? her dad threw a refrigerator jlr

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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Hey babe, did it hurt when the doctor cut off your umbilical cord when your mother gave birth to you. Because I have a bellybutton too!

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops