Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

What's red and can sing? Elmo

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

Women deserve equal rights.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...