There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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