Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

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I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

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A cat playing laser tag.

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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You:Knock knock friend:who's there you:come in friend come on who you:come in your mother

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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