Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

thumb_up thumb_down +7

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Burp

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops