what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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hashtags suck balls

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What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What is the name of the car? What

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

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A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, we have mutual friends, and violets are blue and roses are red. FRIDGE

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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So, you got to take medications daily or die? Are you in pain my dear?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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