there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops