Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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