Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why suck a long face the horse shits on the floor and walks out

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

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whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops