Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

autsim

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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