What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

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What did the black girl say when sho dropped her phone? Oh crap, I dropped my phone.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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