Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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A Irish leaves and bump in to a really tall the Irish sorry boss

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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Q: What's worse than school? A:Your mum dying

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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