What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

Poop

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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