Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

One day a man was really horny and wanted to bang his wife that night, so he took soom horns and banged them against her skull until his wife bled to death. He was later sentenced for homocide and to this day has been in prison

What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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