Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

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One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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What do you get when you mix a refrigerator with a microwave? A refrigerated microwave.

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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