Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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An older man and a young boy are holding hands and walking into the woods together. The boy looks up and say, "gee, I'm scared, it's dark in there." the old man answers, "Yeah, just think how I feel....I have to walk out of here alone!"

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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Want to hear a dirty joke? The horse fell in the mud

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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What did the horse say to the man? The man woke up from his dream so he didn't know either

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops