Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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How do you tickle a tree? you dont you are a schizo stop kicking leaves

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops