your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Dude, that's not banana ice cream...

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Q: Why do all Asians have small penises? A: They don't.

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why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Cuz he is blind You illiterate uneducated racist bastard trying to say it was because he was black.

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If the 49ers won the superbowl

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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What kind of coffee did they drink on the Titanic? They didn't. They all died.

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What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

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Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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