How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

My Nan, that is all.

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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