Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Why did Betty fall out of the tree? Because she was dead! ????

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What was the homeless guy doing on the side of the rode? Begging for money.

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops