Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

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Why are stand up comedians called stand up comedians? Because they are standing up while telling jokes, dumby.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

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A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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who else is on here?

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In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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