This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

knock knock who's there? I'm here.

Q:What happens when you mix Justin Bieber with a women? A: Well, since is a very highly impossible circumstance, I have no need to give a name for this.

What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

how do i know if my husband is cheating? beat him until he tells you

roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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