so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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There are two jews in an oven. One says "It sure is hot in here" and the other says "AHH A TALKING JEW"

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If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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