Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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Why does the fat kid no longer have friends? He died after falling out of a tree.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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Q: How long does it take to dig to China? A: 5 mins. I hire a bunch of mexicans

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A man walks into a bar. Suddenly, he is filled with a strange feeling, as if his life is somehow the subject of a stupid joke. He walks back out of the bar and consults a psychiatrist.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

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Two guys were Arguing. (A & B) A. You suck B. If i suck then you choke. A. The only way id choke is if i smelled your stank ass breathe. B. The only way id have stank ass breathe is if i was liking your moms vagina A. The only way my mom's pussy would stank is if you were liking it. B. The only way id be liking your moms pussy is if it were a dick.... Both stare at each other... and walk off awkwardly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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