So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile Get in the batmobile

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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