"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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