why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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