A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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