what did the black guy get from churches chicken? fried chicken.

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Larry The Cableguy....thats it.

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops