Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

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Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Knock, Knock Come in

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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But that just reinforces the negative stereotype that women don't have penises.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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