Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

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My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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A piece of wood walks into a bonfire. Wood can't walk.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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