A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

the chicken crossed the road. the chicken was then caught by animal control because it was in the middle of a city.

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

whats worse than the holocost, nothing

how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...