patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

People always say if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say Anthony at all. Mimes must be full of hate.

why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

Knock knock... Home invasion

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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