When does a cat not land on its feet? When it lands on its back.

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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Why did the girl trip in the middle of the street? She tripped over the kid who dropped his ice cream because he got hit by a bus.

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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What's worse than burning your bacon? Finding your daughter decapitated and raped in the basement.

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops