How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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What side of the cheetah has the most spots? -The outside.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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I like to eat.

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

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Steering Wheel Face.

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Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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live babies

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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