some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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Carlton

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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Military intelligence.

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What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

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I like to eat.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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Kenny G

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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My mother got hammered last night. We cried at her funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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