What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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a priest, a bishop and a cardinal walk into bar to hand out pamphlets about alcoholism

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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