What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

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what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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chuck norris is a little b|tch

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Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

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What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? Getting herpes from a vibrator that you found in a dumpster.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

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potato

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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