A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

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I like to eat.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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Why was grandma lying on the floor? She just died of lung cancer.

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

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69

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Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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