Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

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The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops