What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Roses are red, yup.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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How Many Chickens does it take to make an egg? NOrmally 2

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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