What does? 42

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

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Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

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Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

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Knock knock Who's there. Interrupting cow, sorry you can see where this is going, just let me in without asking any more questions please.

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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a bunch of guys did cocain for the first time. they later died from a drug over dose.

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

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Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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