why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigorator

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops