The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

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Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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How many black people does it take to for there to be a murder? None. A murder is a group of crows,not black people.

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The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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What do you call a mailman who doesn't deliver mail? Unemployed

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops