first

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

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What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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The diamond one below is hilarious.

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what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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