How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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What's funnier than 1 dead baby? Anything

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Get up Look in the mirror

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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I am paralyzed from the neck down.

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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What did the wall say to the floor? Nothing.

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Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

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Ah, sorry for my failed attempt at being a witty. Yes, it has been a long day, or so the saying goes.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

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why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops