hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops