What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

thumb_up thumb_down -11

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why does the boy like ice-cream? It tastes good.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops