A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

eoin burgin is fat

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops