Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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A man walks into a bar, and he died.

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A black guy and a mexican get into a car Who is driving? Whoever takes a seat in the drivers side of the car

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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