A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

How do you get a black kid to sleep? A cup of warm milk and maybe a lulluby should do it.

-Your momma is so ugly, she wasnt a model. -Am I supposed to be caring?

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

Guess what sucks! A Vaccume. Guess what blows! A Sucky Vaccume.

The Big Band Theory

What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. The prior sentence is a grammatically correct sentence in American English.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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