when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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My Nan, that is all.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops