How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

thumb_up thumb_down +1

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

thumb_up thumb_down +1

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how do you kill a black guy ? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops