Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

thumb_up thumb_down +9

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +9

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops