There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

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Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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