Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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=3

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Q. What do you call a black pilot? A. A pilot.

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My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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Cripples are lame.

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Hi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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