No soup for you!

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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a. why? b. because I wanted

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops