My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops