What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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Once upon a time, your dog got hit by a car this morning

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops