a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

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Women deserve equal rights.

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drugs.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy! But here's my switchblade Get in the trunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops