Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

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A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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Roses are smiling, violets are trying to kill me. DId I mention I'm a paranoid schizophrenic?

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what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

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What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

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what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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