My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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Why is Texas so hot? The sun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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