Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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A duck walked up to a bad hearing drug dealer, and dealer asked duck, "What you do want?" A duck said, "Quack!" So dealer gave duck a crack

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

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a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

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A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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Jack and Jill went down the hill. And were lost and burnt in hell.

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What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

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1+1= 69

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

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What do clowns put on bagels? Cream Cheese

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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