A baby seal walks in to a club

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

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Why did the man go to Chinatown? Because he was hungry.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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Child Prostitution.

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A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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knock knock you may come in

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A baby seal walks into a club

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops