Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because she had been forcibly removed from her place of food preparation by a large angry mob of her neighbours who thought she was a wtitch and were now going to burn at the stake. It is Salem, november 1643.

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

A very busty blond and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender asks with a smile, "What'll be today, pastor?" "Wine. please."

Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

did you hear about the sidewalk? its all over town.

What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

ekoj

Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

American healthcare.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

What do you call a cereal killing homeless man? Roofless

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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