What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

A person with OCD walked into a abr.

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

Knock knock Nobody's home.

Guy 1 : what you watching? Guy 2 : a documentary on birds Guy 1 : can i watch it with you? Guy 2 : yeah sure go for it.....

Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

i like potatoes

What part of the cape were you on? Cod.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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