Is Carly smart? No.

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What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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Situation. A man trying to find meaning in his life. Question. Why are desieses not colorful, and tasty. Answer. Adolf Hitler and his ice cream songs that he sings on sunday mornings during brunches.

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I like jokes.

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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A black gay transvestite prostitute was walking alone through a dark alley one night. Business has been slow tonight, and she is looking for anyone she can find. Suddenly a man jumps out from the shadows, and brutally kills her. What do you call her? Marsha, as such was her name.

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

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Hey, come here often? No.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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