knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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