What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A: Knock Knock.. B: Who's there? A: John B: John Who? A: Shut the hell up, i'm masturbating.

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Why do new moms put "BABY ON BOARD" stickers on the backs of their cars? No reason. Hitting someone's car baby inside or not is against the law and very dangerous for passengers of any age.

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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