An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp?

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what is red and can grow hair water i lied about it growing hair and that it is red

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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