Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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