What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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a man makes a bad joke

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

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alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops