What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

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Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

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Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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roses are red poo is poo

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Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Your girlfriend.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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