Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

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Whats as Heavy as a rock and also as light as a feather? Any object in space because the lack of gravity to give the object weight.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops