I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

A Chinese man fails a math test

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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