What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

thumb_up thumb_down +27

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti-jokes are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

No soup for you!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Dude man, I'm high...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

if you are reading this your wasting your time

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops