Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? a bench is a structure designed for sitting and a Mexican is a person born in Mexico.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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