Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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You want to hear a joke. Sure. A black president. Oh wait...

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Guest what in the butt

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops