Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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If Apple made a house, would it have Windows?

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops