mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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