Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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did you hear about the fly on the toilet? i heard he got pissed off!

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

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Why are black people so good at sports? Through Dedication and lots of training of course

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

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A women left the kitchen.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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Whats worse than finding a maggot in your apple? Getting Raped

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops