What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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