Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

What should you say when someone says a bad joke? I'm sorry, your joke cannot be completed as dialed. Please hang up and don't try again.

Like this joke, bitch.

2 men walk into a bar without thier shirts. They get kicked out. 2 women walk into a bar without thier shirts They got beaten almost to death Why? The men dressed up as women, and every hated them so much they beat the almost to death when 2 cops walk into that bar, see the men dressed up as women and they too beat them. Little do they all know that the men disguised as women are really secret goverment agents looking into a drug deal. The drug dealers got away and now we have 2 people sueing the police department and drugs on the street again. Oh yeah I almost forgot: I made this up so if you read it you're going to die withing the next 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years. I gurantee it. If you dont the men in white coats are going to do extremely painful tests on you and you just might die so then no one will care and maybe get onto thier lives again. Why did I right this? It hasnt happened to me so I dont know If you tell me I will give you something more valueble than gold. Want to know what it is? TELL ME FIRST!!!!

Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

What are the seven wonders of Kentuky cows,drugs,liquor,moutain due,moster trucks,shot guns and trucks oh and I for got Crackle barrle.

Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

One day Rebecca Black was driving down the street in a brand new convertible Luckily a policeman pulled her over after observing that she was far too young to be driving a car. Underage driving is a serious offense and should not be endorsed in music videos.

A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

What is the science of classifying living things? Racism...

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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