Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

A blind man walks into a bar. The shopkeeper says, "the bar is nextdoor." The man walks out.

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...