Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

Roses are red, yup.

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

Q: What happens when Lisa drops an iPad? A: She plays Desperado on the sax.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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