What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

Why didn't he finish his

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

i found waldo.

Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Throw your crépe right into an ocean Where an octopus can get it in all the commotion With the crépe and the ocean and the oc-to-pus

Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

you dint have to be a jew matt

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

R.I.P. Steve Jobs

What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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