What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

What's the capital of Hungary? Thirtsy

Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

what do you call some one with no arms and no legs? names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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