What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

What's harder than nailing a dead baby on a tree? My dick while doing it.

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

Why did the Football Coach go to the Bank?? To Cash his Paycheck.

How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

good looking women

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because numbers, like people, are afraid of all things bigger than themselves

How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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