what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

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A van drives into a car.

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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time to spruce up!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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