What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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I walk into a bar...

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What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

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A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

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a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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What's the difference between Hurricane Sandy and Barrack Obama? One is a catastrophic event that resulted in thousands of deaths, countless power outages and homes destroyed, and millions of dollars in damages, and is said to be one of the worst tropical storms to ever hit the nation. The other is the President of the United States, who has put in an unbelievable amount of effort to fix our economy, create jobs, and make America a better place to live. So as you can see, the two things are extremely different. One must wonder why this question was even asked in the first place, as one is a human being and the other is a storm, making any common traits between them almost non-existent.

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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