Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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