What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops