What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -22

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

white or wheat? wheat please.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your mumma's so fat she is fat

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops