A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

Okay, you seem sincere enough, thing is that I trust you, but your buddies, if you can vouch for them, then I at least know that you are putting your stepmother in danger if you decide to cover for your friends, besides you being such an emotional crybaby kinda gets me into trusting you again.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

your skull would make a nice pen holder

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

Roses are red Violets are blue Everyone on antijoke that steals what I write go to hell My toaster has down syndrom.

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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