What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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