A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

Q: What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by 2 giant scorpions, a fridge, some potatoes and a hule bunch of worms.

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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