how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

what kind of dog can tiptoe

What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

A door walks up with a knob what does the guy do? he opens the door

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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