A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Whats black and hanging from a tree in my backyard? A tire swing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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