A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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if justin beiber was dating a girl what would you call him? a lesbian

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What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

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You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

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Yo mama so fat she was diagnosed with diabetes and now has to regulate her daily intake of foods.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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1+1= 69

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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Q: Whats worse then being murdered? A: Nothing

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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A black guy and a Mexican were in a car. Who was Driving? The police

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What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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