Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

Yo mama so poor... that she possesses substantially less money than the average person working hard in order to accumulate money today.

three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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