A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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jgkbk,mn

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my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

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Two guys were sitting in a pub.

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Why Because

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Brett Farve

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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