Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...