Text this number just cuz 16305208722

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

A black man, a small child, and a priest were all standing in line. They were all checking in the hospital after being in a 3 car pileup

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...