A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they hang around other rich guys

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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if you don't like this you're gay

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops