Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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What did the blonde say when she saw a tan button on her calculator? That must mean tangent.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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there are three women witch one is married? the one with the ring on its finger

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

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No

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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