One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Why does Justin Beiber look like a girl? Because he achieved international fame and fortune at a prepubescent age, and has made more money before he turned 18 than most people will in their entire lives.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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whats black and white and red all over? ...a nun in a blender

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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