Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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A thought for the day: Life is like a game of chess. In the constant struggle for power, control and safe positions it makes no difference whether one plays white or black. As long as everything is planned and one stays a few moves ahead, everything will work out. Just don't annoy the queen, or she may send some very irate knights to fork you or a bishop to flank you. [L]

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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