What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

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What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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What did the girl say when she was hit by a train? Nothing she exploded on impact

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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