What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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Don't you just hate it when somebody is saying something interesting and they don't finish their sentence?

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What did the black father get his child for Christmas? A Yo-Yo. Actually, never-mind, he doesn't know his father.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

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Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

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there's a bus full of black people what do you call the white bus driver? coach.

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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