what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

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How do you teach a blond how to cook? You give her a cookbook, a kitchen, and maybe turn Paula Dean's show on.

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? Black people don't celebrate Christmas.

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

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how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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