a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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When one person has an imaginary friend, you call it being crazy. But when more than one person has the same imaginary friend, you call it religion.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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What sound does a snail make? Meow....... Think hard and you'll get it

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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