A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

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Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

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I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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