Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

i like it in the mouth

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Racial equality.

Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

Poop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...