Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Which deranged adventurer thinks that (one`s unprotected cranium) is stronger than (a brick structure) Mario. he keeps bashing his head on blocks in attempts to prove his own worth

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Refrigerators are whitWhen falling from trees, they kill you

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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