roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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Dane Cook makes a joke.

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

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Why did the boy drop his lolypop Because it tasted bad

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Ryan Maharaj is INDIAN!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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