Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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roses are red violets are blue if i had a gun i would shoot you

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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