a black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. the bartender says thats cool where did you get it ....... the parrot says africa

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

WHY IS THIS SENTENCE CAPITALIZED? BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS ON.

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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