- Anti Joke

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares? Seriously, who, on this planet, bothers to care about such a trivial matter? Is it really that important to you that must be given clarification as to why a random bird species just happened to cross a road? Will knowing benefit your life in some fashion? Well I'd like to know how. Ha! Perhaps you feel that, if you have the answer revealed to you, it will give you extra guidance of some sort in raising a chicken as a pet, or training a chicken to perform tricks for an animal contest, or something along those lines. Well I'm afraid you are out of luck, as I will not tell you. By reading this passage, you are wasting so much precious time. As you keep reading, seconds pass and you only waste more. You could be doing so much more with your life right now. Instead, you could be studying a topic that you might need to be knowledgeable about in the future. You could be shopping for goods. You could be painting a nice picture, writing a short story, or composing a piece of music. You could be getting exercise, or cleaning your house, or spending time with family, or even raising money for charity. There are countless meaningful tasks that you could be carrying out which would benefit you and others around you, including those who are less fortunate than you. But no. Instead you choose to do nothing, reading useless and forgettable anti-jokes on a crummy website, with a strange, fruitless desire of knowing why a chicken crossed a road. You must have such a sad life. You know what? I pity you, so I have decided that I will tell you why the chicken crossed the road. But only if you want to know. You might not want to know by this point. Do you still want to know? Are you sure you do? Are you really, really sure? Because I'm gonna tell you, regardless. Just keep reading! Don't take your eyes off the screen! You will find out exactly why the chicken crossed the road in 3... 2...1... and here we go! Ready, kids? The chicken crossed the road because... because... because... whoops, actually, I forgot. Sorry.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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