A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

thumb_up thumb_down -46

what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

thumb_up thumb_down -48

cool

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Q: What's worse than a paper cut? A: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -50

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

thumb_up thumb_down -52

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

american idol

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a man was shot.... he died

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +35

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops