What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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What did the old person find on the internet? Porn.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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Why did piglet look down the toilet for pooh? He had a horrible mental illness

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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