Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

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How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops