How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?  No Neither has he

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What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

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Jess Burns

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

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I like to eat.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

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A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

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A man walks into a bar. Ow!

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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Why Because

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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