Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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William Raines.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

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What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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What is yellow and sleeps alone? Yoko Ono.

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Why did the black kid fail in school? Because of the achievement gap.

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Why did Susie fall off the song? She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

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your matriarchal component is so overweight that her body mass index is over the desired level for her height and age

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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