I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

whats pink, brown, and smells like a banana. monkey vomit?

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

You're a big fat monkey.

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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