Two cats are sat on a window ledge. One cat looks to the other and says "Meoww".

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops