I'm homeless.

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What did the man say when he saw Niagra falls? Nothing, he was blind.

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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