What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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What do you call a black person born in America? American.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A wonderful dairy product that i can not have due to the fact that i do not own it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

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What did the Religious Education teacher teach on National Science Day? Religion, because that is the teacher's job.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops