Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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eoin burgin is fat

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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