Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Why wasn't Will invited to the party? Will has been dead for 3 years.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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