What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

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How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Shltskc gw? G

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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