Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

learn. advance!

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...