A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I heard an awesome joke last night. I cannot remember it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happens when you light a truck full of babies on fire and drive it off a cliff filled with lava and set off explosives when they land? The babies die. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops