How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops