A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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