why did you poop because you are a poop

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

A black man and a white women are having dinner at a fanncy resteraunt. The waitor asks "Who is the better tipper... I know and hands the check to the white women.

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

One day Jesus said to John, " come forth and recieve everlasting life." Sadly John came in fifth and won a toaster.

Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

Antijokes...

One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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