Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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This is a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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