Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops