How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

thumb_up thumb_down -22

"You can't get past" "I'll get future" dad cri mom cri boy bang girl girl cri women's rites sholdnt exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

9

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops