YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

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What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Procedes with his long difficult hunt to find another companion who accepts him for what he is, without the fear of being eaten.

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What do you call a fat kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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A man is pulled over for drunk driving, and is asked to say the alphabet backwards. When requested to do so, the man says, "officer, I can't even do that when I'm sober," thus admitting that he is drunk. The police officer chuckles at the drunk man's stupidity, and wonders whether or not his wife would find the incident funny. After all, they do share a similar sense of humor.

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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Why was six afraid of seven You would be scared to if your name was six and you knew someone named seven

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Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

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25

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my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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