I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

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what's brown and sticky? A Stick

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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Whats the difference between anne frank and osama bin laden? Nothing. They were both found eventually.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

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Q. What is ginger and ginger? A. a ginger

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red is black green is black i'm batman i'm white,

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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