#IsaiahAfterAD&B

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Chuck Norris once round-house kicked someone so hard that he broke his leg.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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