How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

What the heck are you gonna do if you're on a picnic and have an ice cream and then the ants crawl on the ice cream, what are you gonna do? You're gonna eat the ants because it's made out of protein.

You know that Duck song on youtube? I dont get it... ducks cant talk...

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

Who's Micheal Jackson?

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

were you expecting a joke

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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