A little boy is going to school when he is stopped by a stranger. The stranger tells the little boy, when his teacher asks him why he is late, just say willytop. The boy looks at the stranger oddly, but proceeds to go to school. He arrives 5 minutes late, and is teacher isn't that happy. His teacher asks him why he is late. All the boy says is Willytop. The teacher looks at him horrified, and sends him to the office. Well, the boy arrives in the principals office, and the principal asks him why he was sent down. All the boy said was Willtop. The Principal was so horrified that he expelled the boy from school. Well, the boy went home, to find his parents in the living. They told the boy they knew he was expelled, but they wanted to know why. All the boy said was Willytop. The parents were so horrified by this that they kicked him out of the house. Well, the boy is now walking to dark town streets, when he is stopped by a cop. The cop asks him why he is walking the streets alone. All the boy says is Willytop. The cop is so disgusted, that he kicks the boy out of town. Well, the boy is now sitting in a bar, and the bartender asks him why he is alone. All the boy said was Willytop. The bartender looked at him horrified, but before the bartender could say anything, the boy says "Please sir, I was kicked out of school, my house and even my hometown because of willytop. what does it mean sir?" The bartender nods, and tells the boy to come with him across the street, because if he tells him in the bar, the other people may get mad. Well, the boy and the bartender are across the street from the bar. The bartender opens his mouth, but before he could speak, a drunk driver hits them both.

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

Q: What's 1 + 1? A: I don't know, I am an African who was bought up in the famine my mother died, my father starved. I have to sell myself to feed my sisters. I never went to school and drink my urine every second day because I have no water.

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

how do fit 104 jews in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 100 in the ash tray.

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...