Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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What did Thisara say? You cant see me bich

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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whats worse than finding a dead cat in your kitchen? a dead cat in your bedroom

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? ...

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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This is an anti-joke.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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How did the chicken perform the bank robbery? It was crossing the road and cluelessly walked into a bank, and EVERYONE in that bank had Chickenphobia so they just GAVE him the money...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops