How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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Why was the teacher having sex with her pupils? Because it was 2145 and that kind of shit is common then

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

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What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops