- Anti Joke

Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

Nero: Farewell to my past last part aka No more forced psychiatric evaluations for me. My psychiatric evaluator asked me why I consider myself a souless demon and not a man. My answer was: My mothers name was Maria, my brothers name is Kristoffer and my real father (which I only met once which was meaningless) is a Chatolic priest. Then I showed her (my psychiatric evaluator) my passport, my name is not Nero Angelo, nor whatever my parents might have told others but rather Angelo Nero. So lets conclude shall we? Nero Angelo = Angel black. and some Capcom shit. Angelo Nero = Says on my birth certificate, means Black Angel. Kristoffer= The sacrifice of Christ my half brother. Ricardo my non real father = which has nothing to do with Josef... Thank F*CK! So yeah, some of you might recognize me, but I have not met any family members the last 16 years, so if you where planing to judge me the next time you see me, you better run instead, because I will... "pacify" you for just watching while my parents waterboarded me, for just standing there while my mother tried excorzise me away while beating the crap out of me. I WILL "remove you, forever" the only family I got, are my 2.755 or so members of my movement Neronism, and my wife`s family, this is not a threat.... ...Its a promise to me, and to you. Make no mistake though, Neronism has over 60.000 members worldwide, but I dont care about them, enough is enough. Maria: My birthmother which claimed long before I was born that she was a virgin and as thus that she was giving birth to the anti-christ. (me, thanks mom) Then my psychiatric evaluator asked me if I truly believed I was a demon, where I told her that "human" is just a term, and that I know that calling myself a demon is just a way of coping with my past. She suggested that now that my troubles/parents are over/dead, that my need for her or anyone evaluating me further is over and she jokingly rated me a 100 percent "fresh" when I asked her if I was still a rotten tomato, so I am officially out from the "realm" of psychiatry (which I was forced to after killing my father in self defense). Its been fucking 27 years since, bt finally I am fucking happy... And the hell if there is humanity left in me... >:) M.Biso... I mean Nero. Merry christmas everybody, I know mine is not so bad after all... ill probably spend more time here, but farewell for now, and finally I can scratch the shit out of my ortopedic arm without getting PTSD`s of my non real father tearing my head off... AAAAAAAAAND all is good... Except the fucking itch...

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

Where would Tupac be if he was white? Not the morgue

Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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