Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

Why was this German dude's water bill so high this month? Because there were thirty dead Jews in his shower. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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