Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

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What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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