My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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