Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

The next sentence is true. The previous statement is false.

What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

A Chinese man fails a math test

Tall asians

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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