What's sad about a girl getting hit in the face with a shovel? The shovel got dented..

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops