Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

thumb_up thumb_down -64

How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

thumb_up thumb_down +37

One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops