What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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- What is worse than a baby in a trash bin ? - A baby in five trash bins.

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the sky is green no it is not

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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