How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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You're a big fat monkey.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

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Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

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What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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