Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

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Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

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Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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What is my name? I dont know

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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what do you call a dog with no legs. It dosent matter it wont come

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Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

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roses are red violets are blue wendy williams looks like a man roses are red violets are blue i coach penn state pull down your pants

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops