what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Neither of them talk due to the fact that they are muffins and are inanimate, therefore denying them the ability to talk.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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