A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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