Why do women live longer? Once their sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

whats worse than four babies in a box? one baby in four boxes

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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