What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice? She was reading the nutrition facts, as she was trying to watch her weight.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

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How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

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September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops