What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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hey! have you seen that clown at Walmart that hides from gay people?

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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This is a joke.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

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why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

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What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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