a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

Q: How many chicken nuggets can fit into an olympic size swimming pool? A: 8,563,690,152... Corndogs

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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