what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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